Alone
by The King's Soldier
Summary: In the end, she will always be alone. Because no one ever chooses Morgana.


Disclaimer: Unfortunately, I do not own Merlin either. Come to think of it, I don't own any TV shows. Oh well.

Author's Note: This piece popped into my head completely out of nowhere and refused to leave until I wrote it down. It's just a short and simple piece about how Morgana feels like no one has ever really loved her because when it comes down to it they all choose something else over her. I think it's really deep, and I can see her feeling like this. Also, I wrote this while listening to a piano piece called "Chasing Midnight" (look up "chasing midnight merlin/morgana/mordred" on youtube and it's the first piece) and personally I think the fic is stronger if you listen to that while you read it. But it's up to you. Either way, enjoy!

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><p><strong>Alone<strong>

She isn't really surprised when she catches Guen conspiring with Sir Leon. She knew it was coming, sooner or later. It always does.

But that doesn't make it hurt any less.

After all these years, Morgana knows she should be used to being the one everyone else always overlooks. She should be used to standing in the corner of the court with a smile pasted on her face to hide the tears. She should be used to being alone.

Because no one ever chooses Morgana.

As a child, the local children had wanted nothing to do with a nobleman's daughter. So she had learned to rely on herself. As a teenager, the other young nobles had stayed away from the slightly odd girl that was the King's ward. So she learned to hide who she really was. As a young woman, people finally began to notice her. But it did not take long for her to realize that they wanted the beautiful and charming King's ward, not the opinionated young woman who liked sword fighting and horseback riding.

No one ever chooses Morgana.

Uther chose his honor. His reputation mattered far to him more than a lonely little girl who cried herself to sleep at night.

Gorlois chose war. He claimed he had no choice in the matter, but Morgana knows better. There is always a choice.

Arthur chose his father. He had been her friend once, and had things been different he might have become more. But he would always be a Pendragon first, and she had learned the hard way that he would always choose Uther above anything, even his own conscience.

Merlin chose Camelot. After all his lies about caring for her and being her friend, he had willingly sacrificed her life for the safety of Uther's kingdom. She should have seen it coming. But instead she let herself be fooled by a stupid servant boy who seemed to offer the one thing she wanted most. And when it really mattered, he betrayed her.

Guen chose Arthur. There was a time when Guen was her closest friend, the one who smiled when she laughed and held her when she cried, the one who knew her for who she really was. Things have changed since then. _They_ have changed. But when Camelot fell and Guen agreed to serve her, she had dared to hope... But hope is for fools. Now she knows better.

No one ever chooses Morgana.

People always assumed that as the King's ward, she had everything she could possibly want. But the truth was that she never had the one thing she wanted most. Morgana could have done without the fancy dresses and the wealthy suitors and the expensive gifts. They never meant anything to her anyway. The only thing she ever truly wanted was the one thing the King's treasury could never buy. Love. All she ever really wanted was for someone to finally notice the lonely girl in the corner of the court, someone to see the person behind the face paint and the expensive gowns, someone to value her for who she was, not who her guardian was or who she could someday become. All she really wanted was for someone to care about her.

But as she looks down on Guen and Sir Leon scheming their way back to Arthur, every word another brutal twist of the knife inside her heart, she finally forces herself to accept that the one thing she wants is the one thing she will never have.

Because no one ever chooses Morgana.

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><p>So how was it? Please review and let me know what you thought. :) It will make my day.<p> 


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